Want to leave your job without burning bridges? Follow these practical strategies 👋

+

=

Is this you?

Now that you've made the very important decision to leave your workplace, how can you leave without burning bridges?This question is especially sensitive if you're leaving out of frustration, boredom, anger, or unmet expectations.

That was certainly the case for me. Working in a small industry meant that I needed to contain my feelings of being extremely undervalued and frustrated. So, you aren't alone!

There are practical strategies for any kind of workplace or job that will help you resign and still meet your professional and personal needs.

How you handle your resignation can open doors or burn bridges. Resign gracefully to maintain workplace connections, your reputation, and the good will of your managers to maximize the chances of getting good references.

Emotional Regulation

The first strategy is to remain emotionally regulated in moments of frustration, disappointment, or anger before you have officially resigned and during your resignation notice period.

By approaching your boss when you're angry and frustrated, you may not be able to express yourself effectively or risk not be taken seriously. Venting feels good but that may get back to your management and damage your positive references.

When You...

• Count to 10 to recompose yourself

• Take deep breaths to calm yourself

• Go on a short break

...you can avoid burning important connections and reputational bridges you may need for the longer term.

The Situation

During this morning's meeting, your project — crafted over months — was dismissed with barely a glance.

You felt angry and helpless. It wasn't just this one instance — it was countless unacknowledged efforts, endless overtime, and feeling undervalued.

Luckily, you had already decided to look for a new job and you have a very promising offer on the table. You are so frustrated and feel like quitting right now.

What should you do?

Option A

You need to tell the boss how you feel right now. Honesty is important and the boss needs to know how staff are feeling and how to make things better. You'd feel better, at least.

Option B

Turn to a coworker and tell them exactly how you feel and how much you hate working here. By getting it off your chest, you can now refocus and move on with your tasks.

Option C

Despite your frustration, you pause and take a break. Your feelings are valid but you know that staying professional works better in the long term.

Option D

You feel all of your motivation melt away. You decide that you'll minimize your effort and refuse to respond to emails.

It's very tempting to "send a message" to your workplace or boss by leaving suddenly, avoiding your work or venting loudly and often about your feelings.

Bad news travels fast and so does a negative reputation. To maintain your professional relationships:

Avoid...

• Simply not showing up one day or resigning by text message.

• Blasting your workplace or boss on social media or boasting about leaving to colleagues.

• Failing to complete your tasks or providing a wrap-up before you leave.

Do...

• Provide written formal confirmation of your resignation as soon as you can and before any public announcement.

• Take note of and serve your resignation notice period, and any legal obligations you have.

• Recognize that future employers, clients, customers, and colleagues may reference your social media. Speak to safe people about your feelings, not your social media.

• Understand that your colleagues also deserve an emotionally safe and non-toxic environment. They may be colleagues again, or even your boss, one day.

• Understand that the last impression you leave is the most powerful and lasting. Express gratitude for what you've learned and experienced.

It's all about your "brand maintenance". Support the value you've brought to the workplace by being an engaged and pleasant work mate until you leave.

Photo by Nik on Unsplash

This conversation may be confronting, uncomfortable or emotional for you. The good news is you can prepare, practice, and steer it in the direction that works for you and doesn't burn your bridges.

1. Write your resignation letter.

   Keep your basic resignation letter basic. It's an official document, not a chance to spill the tea. Include:

   • A declaration that you are leaving your job title

   • The date of your last day of employment (a.k.a., notice period)

   • Gratitude for the opportunity

   • Your signature or sign-off

   Pass this to the appropriate department after your conversation.

2. Set up a meeting with your boss.

   This can be at a time, place, and mode (video call, phone, in person) of your choosing.

   Ask for some time to discuss your role and when they can provide you with some dedicated time for that conversation.

3. Advise that you're resigning.

• Be direct

• Be polite

• Don't apologize

• Stick to the facts

• Give thanks for your opportunities

4. Offer to help with a transition.

This will establish goodwill and that you're mindful of the impact this will have.

You may be asked why you're leaving and it is your decision when, how, and if you want to share. Ask yourself if you can have that discussion calmly and respectfully. If your answer is no, this isn't the time. You could request an exit interview instead.

Here are some key actions to help you resign without burning bridges.